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  Table of Contents

  Used

  Praise for Used

  A Note from the Author

  About Used

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Praise for Used

  “USED was amazing. Like seriously amazing. I can't remember the last time I hated to put a book down so I could go to sleep and then immediately pick it up to finish it the next morning. And yet, here we are and that's what I did.”

  - Samantha Chase, New York Times Bestselling Author

  “Heartbreakingly beautiful. This book isn’t about angst and pain. It’s about a fighter-a survivor-that we all attain to be. The story tears you apart in the best ways and builds you back up in the most beautiful.”

  - Nichole Chase, New York Times and USA Today Bestselling Author

  “USED is a raw, heart-wrenching story of surviving trauma, but it's also so much more. It's a romantic, emotionally gratifying tale of unflinching, all-in love. I couldn't turn the pages fast enough.”

  - Brenda Rothert, Author

  “Rarely have I read a book so vividly described, so rich with emotion, that I felt like I lived it. USED is the kind of book that engages your heart and takes you on a journey that leaves you hopeful and empowered by the end.”

  - Erika Kelly, Author

  Used

  By Kate Dunbar

  Copyright © 2020 by Kate Dunbar

  All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in, or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and events are fictitious in every regard. Any similarities to actual events and persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used.

  This book is licensed for your personal use only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return it and purchase your own copy.

  USED

  Copyright © 2020 KATE DUNBAR

  Editing by Jenny Sims of Editing4Indies

  Cover Design and Formatting by Alyssa Garcia of Uplifting Author Services

  Photo Credit: K Keeton Designs; Cameo Hopper (model)

  This book is dedicated to Michael, the man of my dreams.

  Thank you for always being my safe place.

  When I’m with you, I am home.

  A Note from the Author

  USED is my debut novel and was my passion project for five years. It wasn’t always easy for me to get the words down, but it offered moments of healing, laughter, heartache, and sorrow as I wrote it. And by the time I typed THE END, it was a journey of freedom. There are adult themes and situations, so proceed with caution if you need to do so.

  And if you find yourself in an abusive relationship, there is help.

  Don’t stay silent.

  No matter who your abuser is.

  No matter what you’ve been told.

  No matter the lies whispered in your ear.

  You are worth wholeness and freedom.

  Fight for you, friend.

  If you are in a domestic violence situation and need help, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available for you twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.

  Website: http://www.thehotline.org/

  Telephone: 1-800-799-7233

  1-800-787-3224 (TTY for Deaf/hard of hearing)

  Sibling Abuse is much more common than most would expect. Some experts believe it to be “the most common but least reported abuse in the family” (www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202002/sibling-bullying-and-abuse-the-hidden-epidemic). If you are in need of help, the National Child Abuse Hotline is available for you twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.

  Website: https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/

  Telephone: 1-800-4-A-CHILD

  About Used

  At the age of seventeen, after a decade of lies, hurt, and severe abuse by her brother Lucas, Sabra Valentine is able to breathe.

  Lucas is behind bars thanks in large part to Sabra’s quick thinking and self-preservation-even if that’s one more secret she has to keep.

  Now, seven years later, life is moving forward, and Sabra is starting to heal, live, and love again with her friends and Trevor Collins by her side. He’s tall, dark, and sexy, and he doesn’t fall for Sabra’s games. The future is finally looking bright-until one phone call shatters everything.

  Used is a romantic suspense with domestic thriller elements. Please be aware that there are topics which may be triggers for some readers, and this work is meant for mature readers.

  SEVENTEEN and TWENTY

  I was nine when I lied for my brother the first time.

  I’m not sure why I did it. There must have been something instinctual that took over me. A lie or die kind of thing. Not that I would have died if I hadn’t done it. I would have paid in some way though. That much was certain.

  I always paid if I did something he didn’t like. It’s the way it was and always had been for as long as I can remember.

  And no one was there to protect me. Instead, I was the protector of everyone else—of their emotions, their thoughts, their reality.

  The Peacekeeper.

  It’s tragic.

  A house full of terrors, and the monster is your sibling.

  But now.

  I’m free.

  CHAPTER ONE

  The beat of the music pulses inside. It’s cranked as loud as it can go, and bodies are moving under strobing lights everywhere I turn. The bar smells of sweat, alcohol and desire, mixed with the sweet fragrance of weed someone’s lit. I cross the room and fall into the waiting arms of Trevor perched on a barstool. Desire oozes from his every pore. His eyes skim across my body.

  The look in them says all I need to know. He’s caught in my crazy web.

  Play my cards right and this night will be exactly what I want. I close the gap between us, our faces now only inches apart.

  Trevor is a patient man. Four years of friendship with six months of playing cat and mouse and finally, tonight, I’ll let him catch me. Adoration, shivers of pleasure and mind-blowing sex—for both of us.

  I ease myself between his legs, nestle my mouth to his ear, and steal the opportunity to nip his earlobe. “Are you ready to go?” His body comes to attention.

  “I thought we were staying for the midnight bonfire down by the lake and snuggling under a blanket together?” He quirks an eyebrow and tosses me a wry grin. “We w
ouldn’t want to miss the celebration. Isn’t that what you told me on the phone earlier?”

  “I have other plans for celebrating tonight. Which do include being under a blanket.” That grabs his attention. “But if you’re set on roasting marshmallows—” My arm brushes across his lap. I can feel how not interested in roasting marshmallows he is. A small smile creases my lips.

  Sabra: One, Trevor: Zero.

  Boys are so easy. Push your tits up in a great bra, drop your eyes right before you slide them to their face, and every single one of them folds.

  No exceptions.

  You don’t even have to wear the tight dresses some girls put on. It backfires on you in the long run.

  My eyes find Emily across the room. She’s in the standard uniform tonight. The tight sparkly strapless dress that barely covers her ass and boobs. Four-inch peep toe heels. Blood red lips and matching fingernails. There’s a gaggle of boys staring and surrounding her. She’ll bed one of them tonight. But not even one will come back for more. She’s too desperate. Too willing. Cunning, but not cunning enough. She’ll become possessive. Scare the shit out of whichever boy she thinks she’s landed.

  And the rejection will crush her.

  I, on the other hand, have this down to a science. Tight jeans that hug my ass in all the right places. V-neck t-shirt with an outstanding push-up bra. Strappy black heels high enough Trevor can glance into my cleavage and wish he could bury his face in it. His hands are climbing closer to the edge of that fantastic bra, so I’d say my plans are working out fine.

  Boys like a bit of a chase. Give it up the first night they meet you and they’ve forgotten your name by the next. Turn up the heat each time you see them. Make them feel like you’re pushing the envelope one step at a time. And they keep coming back for more.

  I slide my hands down Trevor’s thighs and rest them on his knees. These past six months have been fun. But even I know he’ll want to go to the next level after tonight.

  Commitment.

  I’m going to have to take some sort of action to remedy that.

  Because while I can admit Trevor is different than all the others. Someone I adore and care about for more than just his body and the pleasure he can bring me. Commitment and I do not get along.

  I’ve seen what a man can do to a woman. Enough to know I want none of it for the long-term.

  I hope we can stay friends once this is all done. I know I’m taking a huge risk with him. He’s important to me so it’s a gamble for both of us. This one is going to hurt. I don’t want to admit it to anyone, but I can’t ignore that my heart is more than tied up in this boy. It’s too bad no one gets forever. Trevor would be the first one on my list if they did.

  But that’s a chance I’m not willing to take.

  Trevor’s lips brush the side of my neck and kiss their way down my shoulder. I shiver in anticipation of what’s to come. This is something I can always get behind. Something I always want more of.

  Boys have to mess it up and try to give me what they think I want in life. A ring on the finger. The house with the white picket fence. Kids. Them.

  No. Not happening.

  “Are you ready to go?” I stifle a giggle watching his face. “Or are you content with imagining me naked and nibbling me through my clothes?”

  The giggling is dumb. But those little touches keep the boys thinking you have no idea what you are doing to them. It separates the sweet and innocent girls from—me. And I may know I’m not the kind of girl you take home to Mom, but I don’t need them to know that.

  “You’re serious?” Trevor stares at me dumbfounded with those mossy green eyes. “What time is it?”

  “Nine-thirty. We’ve been here for an hour. Plenty of people have seen us, and we’ve seen them. I doubt anyone would notice if we go now.” I turn and take a step back swaying to the music and stare him dead in the eye with a lifted eyebrow.

  Trevor loves a challenge. I know that better than anyone since he asked me to dinner every day for 6 months before I said yes. “Or we can stay here for a little bit longer. See what happens later.”

  He reaches for my hand to pull me back to his warmth, kissing me hard on the mouth. His hands cradle my neck as his fingers wind themselves into the dark waves of my hair. I slide the palms of my hands down his chiseled chest and breathe across his lips, “Just the beginning, Trev—just the beginning.” His eyes spark with a fire I know and love. This blaze will not be easily put out. And that’s the way I like it.

  Sabra: Two, Trevor: Zero

  He stands without letting go of my hand. Pulls me behind him straight for the door. Trevor has become a man on a mission. My laugh booms across the dance floor when I see him clear a walkway with his other hand, steering us toward freedom. We can see the night sky out the door in front of us, stars sparkling across the navy backdrop. I grip Trevor’s hand tighter, holding on. Trevor stops dead in his tracks, his pathway blocked by one of the biggest guys I’ve ever laid eyes on.

  “Hey man, long time no see.” Trevor drops my hand to do some stupid handshake with a lot of movements to it.

  “Hey Bryan, good to see you.” Trevor yells over the music. “What brings you all the way here?” He draws back from Goliath and finds me. Pulls me back to his side. “Don’t you have a game this week?”

  “Nah, we’ve got a bye. I thought I’d take a break and make a run to check on all of you. See what kind of trouble you’re getting into these days.” He glances my way. One eyebrow lifts, his eyes traveling the length of my body. “Looks like your type of trouble comes in the form of a beautiful brunette,” he adds, holding out a hand. “Bryan Richardson.”

  I grasp his hand without leaving the cocoon of Trevor’s arm. “Sabra Valentine. Pleasure to meet you.” His grip is firm, his smile broadening while his dark eyes stare into mine.

  Trevor clears his throat. “I hate to do this, but we’re on our way out.” He claps Bryan on the shoulder. “Give me a holler tomorrow if you’re still in town. We can grab a beer. Catch up.”

  “You’re leaving?” Bryan runs a hand across the scruff on his face.

  “Sorry, Bro. We’ve got other plans tonight.” He looks at me and links his hand in mine already pulling me toward the door again. “But holler at me tomorrow,” he throws back at his huge friend.

  “It was nice to meet you,” I call out, waving over my shoulder. We slide out the door without a backward glance.

  I drop his hand when we get past the bouncer and run through the parking lot, down the hill to the lake. My laughter is ripped away by the wind circling around me. Bits of grass and pine needles crunch under my shoes. The pounding of Trevor’s feet against the ground echoes behind me. I turn to look at him while I kick my shoes off before snatching them off the ground. The thick foliage of the forest trees spread out before us. I wiggle my toes against the cool leaves beneath my feet and watch Trevor stalk toward me. His face is flushed. He’s not breathing all that hard. But he’s not breathing normal either.

  “You okay?”

  “Of course.” Concern shines in his eyes. “Sorry about Bryan. He’s a bit of a lady’s man ever since he got drafted right out of college. I hope he didn’t make you uncomfortable.”

  “I’m fine.” He must know by now I can take care of myself. “That was nothing.” I roll my eyes at him, waving my hands to dismiss the thought. A few steps backward bring me to the nearest pine tree, tall and stately. The first in a cavalry of many. Trevor jogs a few steps closer. His body closing in, one arm resting above my head on the bark while his other hand tugs the heels from my hand and drops them beside us.

  He leans closer so his mouth is inches from my own. “Are you sure it was nothing? He seemed to like what he saw.”

  Wait. What? Is that jealousy I see?

  “Bryan’s just another guy. I only have eyes for you. You’re all I want. Don’t be a jealous caveman.” I glance into his eyes and bite my bottom lip. My fingers rest against his chest toying with the buttons on his nav
y shirt. The sleeves are rolled up to his forearms giving me the perfect view of muscle and veins. All of which I want to trace with my tongue.

  There’s a couple of inches separating our bodies. Heat radiates off him. All I can think about is closing the gap. I let my eyes trail from his chest. His lips. His eyes. Those smoldering green eyes. I hook one thumb in his belt loop before reaching up and brushing the dark hair off his forehead. “But I’m sorry he made you uncomfortable. I’d hate for that to get in your head and ruin our night.”

  His eyes widen, eyebrows shooting into his hairline. “First, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t get jealous.” He trails a finger across my collarbone before pressing his lips to mine. “Second, the night is still young.” One shoulder lifts. “But if you’re tired, or ready to go, I can take you home. To be clear, though, nothing is ruined from where I stand.” He leans in for another soft kiss. Runs his tongue across my bottom lip.

  I yank his body to mine by his belt loop and crush my lips to his. It’s all the invitation he needs. Trevor’s hands find their way to my t-shirt. His fingers skim along the edge feathering across my skin. All I want is more of him. Of this.

  My hands clench his shirt wrinkling it in my tight grip. I tug on his bottom lip with my teeth and smile. Trevor’s lips trail steamy kisses from behind my ear to my neck and shoulder. I unfurl my fingers from the fabric and reach up, curl them in his hair. His face looms back in front of mine. My arms wrap around his neck and he grins at me. His hot and steady hands slide from my back around to my stomach. There’s no hesitation in Trevor when his fingers glide to my lace covered breasts, giving them a light squeeze.

  “Trevor,” I breathe into the quiet. The wind rustles the branches surrounding us. My hands move down his chest, stopping at the top of his jeans. I hook my thumbs back in his belt loops.